All of us have a metaphorical bucket representing how we feel from moment to moment. But how do we keep that bucket full and keep ourselves brimming with positive energy that not only improves our own lives but the lives of others around us?

Are you using what you’ve learned in your NLP training to shine a light on what is right in life instead of what is wrong?  How do people “feel” when they are around you? What impression do you create? What impression do you leave?

Richard Bandler stresses that NLP is nothing more than an attitude that has left in it’s trail some great techniques that have been developed as a result. This attitude of curiosity stems from the desire to understand people, how they ‘work’ (perfectly) and how to improve lives.

If our lives as practitioners of NLP is to improve those around us, than it’s worth modeling people like Tom Rath.

You can do this from reading his book “How Full is Your Bucket.” I could write a long review but it doesn’t need it. It’s an easy to read book, to the point, and if you practice the principles your interactions with others (including your customers) will improve. He’s also the author of Strengths Finder 2.0 and several other books. Here a video to give you a taste of his book.

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I read an interesting article today that answers the question, “What inspires people to take NLP training?”

Here is a paragraph from it, and it’s an article worth reading:

“For a start, NLP training provides an in depth understanding of NLP itself. Neuro-linguistic programming (or NLP) is essentially the study of excellence and understanding how and why those who excel in their fields do so.”

Read the full article here

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These are 8 reasons that I’ve found to be true when observing why people put salespeople off during the sales process. It’s of course, not an absolute list.

So here they are, the top 8 reasons why prospects put you off:

1. You didn’t sell on the value of moving forward quickly. What’s the benefit to them if they buy sooner than later? What are the consequences if they wait until later?

2. They are scared of making a bad decision.

3. They normally make decisions over a certain period of time.

4. They normally make decisions after hearing about it or seeing the offer a certain amount of times.

5. They need to feel they have some sort of proof.

6. Loss of options.

7. They are reactive people, rather than proactive.

8. They don’t believe you.

Creating urgency is tricky in sales. But there are ways to create urgency using various NLP language patterns tailored to how your buyer buys. Perhaps future or past posts will reveal these strategies.

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NLP is full of fancy jargon, and you need a glossary of terms when attending a NLP Practitioner Training just to make sense of it all. “Presuppositions” are no exception, even though most think they know what it means.

Presuppositions are simply the linguistic equivalent of what most people call assumptions. But with a little more art and science to it when used on purpose.

Whenever we are communicating, we use presuppositions that assume something is already true; every sentence we speak in our everyday life has a presupposition in it. In most cases, we tend not to consciously recognize what we have presupposed, and instead concentrate on what is directly stated. Thus, presuppositions are unconsciously accepted as being true and the listener will act as if they were true.

Naturally, that’s the powerful part.

Think of it like this. Every sentence you speak contains a noun and a verb, so, with each sentence you speak you actually presuppose that something exists (noun) in the past, present or future.  You also presuppose that some action did or did not take place, is or is not taking place, or will or will not take place.

Great salespeople know how to use this to their advantage.

Some of my favorite “presuppositional” categories are:

Cognitive qualifiers: “Surprisingly, interestingly, amazingly, fortunately, luckily, happily, curiously, uniquely, naturally, obviously, etc.”  Everything that follows this word is assumed true as the focus is on the word (the cognitive qualifier) that starts the sentence assuming it so.  For more info on Cognitive Qualifiers - click here.

Presuppositions that shift space (in the mind of your prospects): “Along side of that, stacked on top of that, in addition to that, adding to that, instead of that, in front of that, inside of that, outside of that, behind that, underneath that, between that, above all that, etc.”

Presuppositions that shift time (in the mind of your customers): “look back on, in the future, right now, before, once, look ahead, finally, after, long awaited, everlasting, accelerate, presently, yet, carry through, then, when, now, etc.”

Presuppositional words that say something is factual, actual, or the truth: “actually, genuinely, unquestionably, surely, certainly, proven, obviously, self evident, valid, absolute, clearly, surely, naturally, etc.”

Presuppositional words of power: Realize, aware, notice, discover, uncover.

Future posts will have some examples of these, but this should get you thinking and more importantly, creating.

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Metaphors. That’s the secret.

Surprised? You shouldn’t be. Using metaphors appeals the your prospects or customers right brain. It helps them visual, instantly relate, connect the dots to what you are saying or recommending. And it’s memorable.

The process behind a recommendation that’s rephrased framed with a metaphor is actually simple.

First, ask yourself: What am I actually recommending?

Second, determine the problem your recommendation will solve.

Third, run through various possible metaphors, selecting the one that communicates most clearly and vividly what you’re urging.

For example, let’s say you are recommending that your team goes through some team building training to improve collaboration on projects. The problem to be solved is lack of communication, morale, and productivity. Here is a sample metaphor you could use:

“It will move us from a company of stray shooters to a team of marksmen.”

Here is another example. You are recommending someone replace their current software system with the one you are selling. The problem is the old system is too slow. An example of a metaphor you could use is:

“When we’re done, it will be like replacing a horse and buggy with a Porsche.”

How can you work on this? Just follow these steps each time:

Step 1 - List out a recommendation you’ve recently made to a client.

Step 2 - What problem does it solve ?

Step 3 -What metaphor can make that recommendation more vivid in your customer’s mind?

Resource: You learned how to construct metaphors in your Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) practitioner training. David Gordon’s book on Therapeutic Metaphors is a great place to start, and while not overtly so in the book itself, it’s just as practical for business applications as it is therapy.

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It’s easy to tell when your prospect or customer is talking to themselves because they will often lean their head to one side, nestling it on their hand or fist. Some call this the “telephone position” because the posture often resembles talking on the phone. Looking down to the left or right while doing this is also a good indication of someone talking to themselves.

NLP teaches us to track eye movements and calibrate the responses. Once you’ve calibrated their eye movements (don’t just rely on the “eye movement chart”) you can then adapt your language to pace their thinking.

Examples of what you might say include:

“Well, when you say to yourself…”

“When you tell yourself…”

“What do you tell yourself when…”

“What if you told yourself…”

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If you can’t solve a problem, it’s because you’re playing by the rules.

Or perhaps just the rules you have in your mind.

Any questions?

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With all there is to see and do, there’s really no excuse for boredom.

Maybe it’s just a symptom. Or perhaps it’s a sign of creative starvation. It’s really just a pattern. You can interrupt it at any time.

Don’t settle for boredom. Get up. Get going. Do something. Start a project. Call a friend or family member. Write something down. Build something. Anything is better than more of of the nothing that doesn’t stimulate you.

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Sam Harrison tells the story:

An old man witnessed a traffic accident, and in court the defense attorney tried to discredit his testimony.

“Mr. Johnson, I see you are wearing thick glasses,” said the lawyer.

“Yes sir, I do.”

“And you’re up in age, aren’t you?

“Yes sir, proudly, I’m 84 in May.”

“So exactly how far can you see, Mr. Smith?”

The old guy thought for a minute, “Well, sir, I can see the moon. How far is that?”

Don’t ever underestimate observation’s reach. What are you [not] noticing? What are you focused on, habitually when watching people? Honing your NLP skills starts with noticing more, focusing on what others aren’t and paying attention to people’s behaviors, patterns, and beliefs.

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Check out one of Seth Godin’s recent post on the three different types of people and how each reacts to change and opportunity.

And if you haven’t read Seth’s Books (I recommend all reading them all), you are missing out. From a fresh marketing perspective, nobody reframes beliefs the way he does.

He’s worth modeling - and after all, isn’t that what NLP is really all about?

Check out the article here

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I’ve written about dealing with resistance on this blog a few times  (see part 1 and part 2 posts).  I have a class I teach on the subject so there is a lot more that we could discuss to clarify this important part of selling.

However, while it’s simple to think of inoculating objections as “overcoming them before they come up” and reframing the meaning, it’s not the only way to approach it.

Inoculating objections is more about installing an attitude into your customer’s mind as a pre-frame to your presentation. What attitude do you want your customer to have? What thoughts do you want them to think? What do you want them thinking about?

Do you want them open minded? Do you want them interested? The good news is you can control how someone is thinking. You have tremendous influence over what your prospects are thinking about.

For example - take a moment and think of your first car you owned. What color was it? Do you have many memories that help you remember that first car?  If you are thinking of your first car, or visualized what it looked like in your mind, or if you thought of other memories you have that were related to that first car - I directed and influenced your thinking.  So again, what do you want your customers to think about? Also, remember to use 3rd party referencing.

How do you plant the open-mindedness seeds?

“Mr. Smith, you may be unlike some of our other clients, who are facing budget constraints for 2010. A recent client of ours made it clear that their budget wouldn’t allow for reallocation of funds to purchase what we offer unless it made perfect sense. And it wouldn’t make sense for them, of course, unless what we could do for them could increase sales. Luckily, they were open minded, and it ended up working our for them in the end.”

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Each Friday I conduct two sales training classes, a basic “fast track” class followed by a more advanced “sales mastery” class on behalf of The Performance Group, a sales development company in Des Moines, IA.

What I’ve learned most, recently, is that salespeople have become really skilled at getting in their own way. Or perhaps letting their “thoughts” get in their way.

Luckily, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) has taught us some specific ways to use our brain.  That doesn’t mean we always “use” what we know.

Most people do not use their brains deliberately - if you stop and think about it. Instead your responses are automatic. If you have a sales presentation that ended up bad, do you walk away and find yourself re-living the experience? Five hours later and you are still in the same state, re-living it over and over. Beating yourself up over it, mentally. “If only I would have…” “I should have said this…” “I didn’t ask the right questions…” “This damn economy!” Whatever.

I invite students to listen to the voice inside their head. Notice the tonality, the volume (how loud are you talking to yourself!?), the pitch and rhythm. And then notice how you feel when you speak to yourself this way.

I had a salesperson say to me last week, “It’s hard to figure out what I did or what to do differently after I’ve done a bad presentation.” I responded, “No kidding. How could you expect to with all that you have going on inside you head afterwards. There is not room for resourcefulness when you are drowning everything else out.” Literally.

Once you understand, deliberately, how you are thinking, you can begin to do it differently.

It takes a conscious, deliberate effort to think of someone that has said something to you that was particularly pleasing. Then to take those sub-modalities and talk to yourself in that way, with the same critical ‘content.’ Noticing how differently you are able to respond to the same critical words is your test. If you aren’t getting the change of state you desire, change more sub-modalities until you get the results you are after. Perhaps you hear the critical voice in the voice of someone that makes you feel great when they talk to you. Why not?

But is this only for dealing with your “self-talk” after you have a sales call go bad?

No.

It’s for before you have a sales call go good.

So before you sell, “use your brain for a change.” (In the words of RB).

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I remember going through school watching the “in-crowd” making fun of those who preferred to study than go out and play.

There still seem to be people who think they will be able to achieve all they desire by staying the same and refusing to change.

I ran across an old friend a long while back and he said, “yep, I’m the same as I was in high school.” And I thought, “how sad.” Tragic maybe.

I encourage everyone to never stop learning and growing. I certainly have a long way to go myself in this pursuit of excellence, personally and professionally.

I want to be better every day. By wanting that, I’m making a conscious decision to try new things, learn new things maybe even get rid of some old habits, attitudes and actions that have actually held me back.

NLP gives us the tools to change our state in an instant by changing our own sub-modalities, how we represent our reality inside our minds. It’s not that we didn’t have these abilities or “tools” before NLP, but it’s made us more aware of how to consciously change our own minds and maybe help others along the way.

Being excellent is a choice. So is being mediocre.

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One of the first lessons we learn in basic NLP training is “the map is not the territory.”  Everyone experiences their world differently and as we mature we form our own “model of the world.” Or, you could just say we form our own reality that is based on our beliefs systems, our thinking patterns, etc.

Think about how your world changes from high school to now? I have had many friends over the years, but I look back today and there are only a handful who I stay in touch with on a regular basis. Although Facebook seems to be changing this.

Some of my old friends no longer share the same beliefs as I do, the same interests, or values.

As I’ve matured and continue to listen to those I perceive as successful (living life the way they want to live it doing something they love!), I’ve made it a conscious effort to surround myself with like-minded people.

I’m not talking about people who sing your praises every day. I’m talking about people who challenge you to achieve greater things.

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